Get the scoop on Mary Ellyn (aka Empyrean) of Empowerment Through Exotic Dance!

How did you get started taking pole dancing lessons?

I first fell in love with pole dancing when I unexpectedly saw a beautiful (graceful, not advanced) pole dancer during my first trip to a strip club when I was 39 years old. After that, I’d pole dance when I was out at a bar with a pole, but I didn’t have my first lesson until a couple years later when I was vacationing in Jamaica, and it was from a male employee at the resort we were at.

Although I was working out regularly, I couldn’t do anything he showed me and I was really frustrated by that. So, I kept sneaking back into the room during the week to practice on my own, and, by the end of the week, I was able to climb and hold myself up on the pole for a bit. I realized I didn’t gain muscle in just a couple of days, so I was intrigued by what I had accomplished and anxious to learn more.

On the flight home, I told my husband I wanted to get a dance pole (which he readily agreed to!) even though at the time I had no idea how much the pole world was already growing or that there even were removable poles – or studios teaching pole dance. I had no idea it had been on Oprah until I started talking about it to friends who were excited to hear I was going to buy a pole. Of course, they all wanted to try it!

How did you make the leap to opening your own studio and offering pole dancing classes? What was that like?

I was primarily self-taught for the first couple of years, and one thing led to the next and I was being asked to teach because there was no place else to learn in Chicago at the time. So, I started teaching small groups and parties and eventually opened my studio in 2005. I continued to learn on my own until I was able to travel more and train with others in the business.

I loved teaching and sharing right away – our first class had three students, including a friend of mine, with one pole in the middle of our reception area for our accounting business! From there, we grew until we opened a couple of walls and expanded. We now have what we refer to as a “transformer” studio where we move the office furniture out each night and move the poles in! We have a satellite studio now and run about 15 classes a week.

What is the first thing you teach students just starting to take pole dancing classes?

Safety and body mechanics! I also explain that this isn’t just a dance class, but is also a class on physics. At orientation, they also learn their first pole routine with a sexy walk, pirouette, backslide, and a fireman spin.

You also do pole dance instructor training. What do you emphasize and how did you develop your coursework?

Safety – that comes up a lot in my classes. The other part of instructor training that is important and I feel is something I’m good at, is breaking down moves in a clear and concise manner. Learning to speak different “languages” when teaching, as students will respond to different types of commands – for example, some prefer the terms right and left and others prefer inside and outside. Then, watching how your students respond to your “language” and if they don’t get it, trying another. Even today, I still come up with new ways of instructing a fireman spin when a student is struggling to learn.

I was previously certified as a group fitness instructor through AFAA, so the structure of my class is developed similarly to that style but most of it just came to me naturally. The content just seemed like common sense to me so when I began writing the curriculum, it just flowed.

Favorite makeup tip:

Always use under eye concealer and please check the mirror closely or get a magnifying make up mirror to check for smudges and make up lines.

Barefoot, sneakers, or platform heels?

Class: My students and I always learn in bare feet. Performing: I feel more secure barefoot so if I’m nervous about dancing I’ll dance in bare feet. If I’m comfortable, I dance better in heels. Going out on the town: heels! Around the house: barefoot.

Favorite grip enhancer:

I seldom use grip enhancers. I keep a lot of them around for students to try, so if I feel a need to use one I just grab whatever is handy.

Pole dance move that made you proudest to learn:

Knee hold, because I never thought I’d be able to do it without extreme pain. Then, the handspring because it took the longest to learn.

Pole dance pet peeves:

1. Wearing wristbands to prevent pole burn of the wrist when you should be dancing with your wrist in neutral alignment and then you won’t get pole burn!

2. Saying, “I can’t __________”

3. Monkey Toes! (My students will laugh when they read this one!)

Favorite treatment for bruises and sore muscles:

I don’t use anything for bruises, as it doesn’t bother me to have them. For sore muscles, heat, massage, and one day off or gentle use the next day.

Who would you most like to have in the audience when you pole dance?

NO ONE! LOL. I actually hate to perform. I consider myself a teacher, not a performer, and I have terrible stage fright. But, it is a goal of mine to do more performances and become more comfortable with it this year. I definitely feel best when my husband is present, though.

Who is your hero or role model?

My heroes are the women who come to our classes and work hard and accomplish their goals. Seeing a woman who is really enjoying herself, or who comes out of her shell, or is awkward at first, but learns to dance gracefully, is amazing!

My role model has been KT Coates. She took the time to help me over the Internet when there were no studios to learn from locally, and I have always tried to emulate her style of instruction and dedication to safety.

What are your favorite words of encouragement?

“Yes, you can!”

Favorite pizza toppings:

Just sausage and cheese.

Cupcakes or ice cream?

Haagen Dazs Dulce De Leche or Oberweiss cotton candy.

What do you like to do when you’re not pole dancing?

Read and hang out on the internet! I love time with my sons when they aren’t too busy to hang with mom! And quiet evenings at home with my husband.

Anything else you’d like to share:

I remember being on a cruise ship once and they had a Latin dance lounge and we stopped every night, along with a huge crowd that would gather, just to watch the women (other cruise guests) who would dance together there. It was hard to walk away until they stopped. It was mesmerizing and very hot – and based on how they danced and smiled, they knew it and enjoyed being sexy and all the attention!!!

All forms of dance are sensual … all forms of dance and fitness are about celebrating the movement of the body. There isn’t a single sport or dance style that is expecting you to notice what great eyes the dancer has! No matter what style of dance or fitness you choose, it’s about how you move your body while people are watching. You may dance in front of a crowd, or you may only dance for your partner, or by yourself in front of a mirror, but usually someone is watching your body – even if it’s yourself. If it’s ok to watch the body in salsa, pole is no different!

Mary Ellyn teaches at Empowerment Through Exotic Dance and is also a
candidate for pole dance instructor of the year with the IPDFA!